December 22, 2013

Swank Family 2013 Christmas Letter

Merry Christmas!  

We can’t believe it’s time to write another silly Christmas letter.  We’re still dealing with all the cease and desist requests we received from people demanding to be removed from our mailing list last year.  Darn lawyers.


We blog about our lives every week, so what can we say that we haven’t already told people?  We honestly considered doing one of those glossy photo cards this year, but then remembered that we’re not very attractive people.  Those high resolution photos don’t do us any justice.  We’re much better served by the crap photos our home printer creates.


We have dealt with a lot of change this year.  Change sucks.

After fourteen years of working at Nor-Tech, Todd accepted a new job at a different computer manufacturer called Equus.  Although it was really hard to leave his good friends, he felt it was time to take on a new challenge.  He’s no longer doing sales, but instead is leading a team of product managers and is hard at work helping them to develop new servers, computers, and notebooks that will make people forget all about the new products bring shipped from Apple and Google.    Should be pretty easy.


Sheri also changed career paths and retired from her job as a paraprofessional at a local elementary school.   She now is a full time mom and basically lays around the house all day watching TV.  At least that’s what Todd thinks she does.  He also thinks that little elves come in and mow our lawn, do our laundry, cook our meals, and beat our children when they don’t do their homework.  He doesn’t realize those little elves need to be managed.  That must be what Sheri does during the commercials.


Luke and Avery changed schools this year and are now officially freshmen in high school.  Which means they get their heads shoved in toilets on a pretty regular basis.  Not at school mind you.  Apparently, that isn’t a thing anymore.  Instead, their dad does this to them at home.  He figures since it happened to him so much when he was a freshman, this would finally give him the chance to get some revenge.  When they’re not dealing with swirlies, the boys spend their free time focused on Boy Scouts, Band, and Robotics.  And girls.

Sunny is gonna be nine in 2014 and is really starting to slow down.  So the only change he really has to deal with is when we change his doggie diapers every time he becomes fecally incontinent.  Which sadly is becoming a much more common occurrence 


For 2014, we’re going to figure this whole life thing out so we have a much better letter to write for you next December.  This one was horrible.


God Bless Us Everyone!


The Swank Family