Minnesota's Pumpkin Wonderland: The Jack O' Lantern Spectacular

 

Minnesota's Pumpkin Wonderland: The Jack O' Lantern Spectacular

Todd Swank's Diary Entry for November 3, 2024

This fall in Minnesota was unusually warm, making the trees hang on to their leaves far past their due date. But as soon as we got some rain this week, they all seemed to drop at once, like the trees were playing a cruel joke. Thankfully, Miss Sheri loves raking—otherwise, we'd be buried up to our ears and Googling “how to winterize a leaf pile?”

The white stuff made its appearance this week, because why wouldn’t it? It’s Minnesota. Still, somehow, we’re never quite mentally prepared when it shows up, clinging to fall like we’re in a custody battle with winter—the parent no one wants to live with.

On Wednesday night, we headed to the Minnesota Zoo for the Jack-O-Lantern Spectacular. This event boasts thousands of intricately carved pumpkins, turning the zoo into a glowing wonderland of illuminated art and eerie displays. Each pumpkin tells a different story, ranging from iconic scenes to creative, spooky designs. Walking through, it's clear this is Halloween on steroids, where even the pumpkins are working overtime for your amazement. By the end, you start questioning your own carving skills and wondering if a triangle-eyed face ever really cut it.

Walking deep into the zoo, we spent a solid 20 minutes cracking jokes about how we’d been duped into the world's longest, pumpkin-less hike. But when we finally reached the spectacle, it hit us like a Halloween fever dream. Thousands of glowing, intricately carved pumpkins staring back at us, and suddenly, the walk didn't feel so ridiculous. Turns out, the joke was on us—those pumpkins knew exactly how to stage a dramatic entrance.

I’ve always admired artists, mostly because I can’t draw a stick figure that looks trustworthy. But these pumpkin-carving virtuosos? Next level. I can’t even fathom where to start making something like this, and there were hundreds of them. Then you find out they spend 10 hours carving each one only for it to turn into a mushy science project in four days. That’s the kind of commitment that makes the rest of us look like slackers.

Seeing Beavis and Butthead carved into a pumpkin brought back all those “yeah yeah, cool” memories from back in the day. Their take on life was always pure, stupid brilliance—finding enlightenment in nachos and chanting “fire” like it was a mantra. And now, they’re enshrined on a pumpkin destined to rot quicker than Beavis’s chances of ever scoring. It’s the perfect nod to two icons who thrived on chaos and temporary glory.

The Jack-O-Lantern Spectacular really leaned into its Minnesota roots with references to everything from Paul Bunyan to, yes, a pumpkin carved with a Spam can. For those outside the Midwest, Spam isn’t just a sketchy meat product—it’s a point of pride here. Born in Austin, Minnesota, this iconic canned mystery meat got many families through tough times and became the unofficial state mascot that nobody asked for. Seeing it carved meticulously on a pumpkin? That’s when you know the state fair vibe is alive and well, even in late October. 

Seeing Anthony Edwards carved into a pumpkin was a tribute I didn't know I needed. His standout performances for Team USA this past summer, where he showcased his scoring prowess and leadership, reminded us why he's such a fan favorite. Naturally, it set the stage perfectly for our next outing—catching him in action at a Timberwolves game.

Miss Sheri and I hit our first Timberwolves game of the season, buzzing with optimism because, hey, they made it to the Western Conference finals last year. We’re hoping they go even farther this time. Maybe all the way to the finals, where they can finally achieve what we all expect: a dramatic fourth-quarter collapse and the phrase “Well, there’s always next year” said through gritted teeth. Ah, Minnesota sports—where hope springs eternal and dies just as quickly.

As luck would have it, our first game of the season was against Luka, Kyrie, and the Dallas Mavericks—basically, the guys who sent us packing last year. The Wolves looked ready for battle, and the crowd was buzzing with the hope that this time would be different. But with Luka’s smirk and Kyrie’s unpredictability, we knew it could go one of two ways: victory or that familiar Minnesota feeling we all know too well—the "close, but let’s start drafting our apologies for next year."

Anthony Edwards came out swinging, dropping 24 points in the first quarter with six 3-pointers, making the Mavericks wonder if they’d wandered into a shooting clinic. Meanwhile, Luka Doncic put up a modest 5 points, looking less like the star and more like the guy holding everyone’s jackets. By the time the quarter ended, it was clear: Edwards was on a mission, and the rest of us were just praying Minnesota wouldn’t find a way to ruin it.

The game was a rollercoaster—momentum swinging back and forth with every possession. Just when the Wolves seemed ready to pull ahead, Luka and Kyrie would hit back like a one-two punch, reminding us that hope in Minnesota sports is always a fragile thing.

 In the end, Luka and Kyrie proved why they’re the dynamic duo, with their supporting cast stepping up to seal the deal. The Wolves gave it their all, but Dallas walked away with the win, leaving us with that familiar post-game mantra: "It’s a long season, we’ll figure it out… right?"

@toddswank Let’s go Timberwolves!! #minnesota #timberwolves #nba ♬ original sound - Todd Swank

@toddswank Timberwolves get beat by the Mavericks on October29,2024. #timberwolves #mavericks #nba ♬ original sound - Todd Swank

@toddswank Happy Halloween! The Jack ‘o Lantern Spectacular! #halloween #pumpkins #jackolantern ♬ Trick or Treat - FASSounds

Down the Path to Minnesota's Own Wonderland

 

Down the Path to Minnesota's Own Wonderland

Todd Swank's Diary Entry for October 27, 2024

Wednesday night, I reconnected with my old buddies, Tim and Brad, at Baker's Ribs in Eden Prairie—a cozy BBQ joint that smells like heaven and tastes like a cardiologist's worst nightmare. It was our monthly gathering for the Twin Cities Clear Lake Club, where we devote a couple of hours to solving the world’s problems, reliving our high school glory days, and seeing who can pull off the best sarcastic jab without spilling BBQ sauce. Nothing like the simple pleasure of swapping stories with old friends over a plate of ribs.

Luke invited us over to his place for Thursday night’s Vikings game, with the shocking promise of homemade lasagna. Turns out he bought the ingredients, but his roommate Jackson was the chef — which was just fine by me. Jackson nailed it; the lasagna was the highlight of the night, hands down. As for our once-undefeated Vikings, now on a two-game losing streak? Let’s just say Kupp and Nacua’s return for the Rams reminded us how good they can be, and Stafford had himself a game. Here’s hoping the Vikings bounce back against the Colts next week and snap this rough patch.

After realizing it had been way too long since we'd seen Karl and Tina Zitzewitz, we set out for a little escape to Minnesota’s own version of Wonderland—Can Can Wonderland. This place has it all: vintage games, quirky mini-golf, and walls covered in art that make you feel like you've fallen down a very eccentric rabbit hole. With Halloween decorations up and waitstaff dressed in costumes, it was a surreal mix of spooky and whimsical—a bit like stepping into Alice's Wonderland if she'd stumbled into a haunted funhouse instead of a tea party.

Can Can Wonderland’s got the kind of history you just don’t make up—housed in an old factory where American Can Company used to churn out cans for brands like Campbell’s and Del Monte. Now, it’s an artsy playground with a twist, blending nostalgia and arcade mania. Picture a vintage carnival: pinball machines dating back to the 1920s, skee-ball, old-school photo booths, and rows of classic arcade games that make you wish quarters were still a currency. It’s basically a paradise for anyone with a competitive streak and a love for all things retro.

There’s something about playing those old arcade games at Can Can Wonderland that took me right back. When I was a kid, my dad would leave me quarters, and I’d swing by his place after school to pick them up. Then it was straight to The Coin Chute in Regency Mall, where I’d dive into Pac-Man, Donkey Kong, Centipede, and every pinball machine in sight. Playing those vintage games now, with the sounds, the lights, and that familiar clatter, was a serious blast from the past—only this time, I had a cold beer to keep me company instead of root beer. Some upgrades just come with age!

Can Can Wonderland’s mini golf course is an interactive art exhibit disguised as putt-putt, with each hole crafted by a local artist. We arrived early to avoid the infamously long Saturday night waitlist. From a tornado that swirls around your ball to a hole where you putt through Grandma’s 1970s living room, each twist on the course adds a unique, Minnesotan flavor to the experience. It’s like walking through an art installation where the only rule is: keep your ball moving forward.

Each hole at Can Can Wonderland’s mini-golf course is a unique experience, and trying to sink a pool shot with your putter on this pool table-themed hole definitely kept us on our toes. The whole course is packed with wildly imaginative designs, like the towering “Music Mountain” where old instruments play sound effects as your ball bounces through. And then there’s the “Rube Goldberg” hole, sending your ball through an elaborate series of ramps and loops. Every hole here takes mini-golf into a whole new realm, turning a simple game into a blend of art and adventure.

This robot just speaks to me—standing there, all shiny and welcoming, as if he's already convinced I'll be one of his loyal subjects. There’s something almost comforting about knowing I could end up in servitude to this guy. If AI is coming to rule us all, at least I've found the overlord I wouldn’t mind taking commands from.

Karl had some fun playing up the spook factor, hamming it up with the skeleton bartender and giving exaggerated side-eyes to the Halloween décor. He might not have been genuinely freaked out, but he definitely kept us laughing with his ‘haunted’ expressions. A little Halloween drama never hurts, right?

After our adventure in Wonderland, we wound down at Surly Brewing – a haven for beer lovers. Surly’s Furious IPA and rotating seasonal brews had us hooked, and the brewery vibe was industrial yet inviting.  Being with Karl and Tina made it all the better, reminding us that we don’t get together nearly often enough.

The Leaves are Brown and the Sky is Gray

 

The Leaves are Brown and the Sky is Gray

Todd Swank's Diary Entry for October 20, 2024

I spent most of the week in Chicago for a conference called Utility Analytics Week. While a couple of my customers were there learning about grid reliability, outage prevention, and all the tech to make utilities run smoother, I was there with a different mission: understanding what makes these customers tick. I wanted to dig deeper into their focus areas, network like crazy, and build some new relationships. It was mostly meetings and presentations at the conference center, but I managed to escape to the Loop for dinner and take in some of Chicago’s iconic architecture. Fun fact: The Loop got its name from the elevated train tracks that circle downtown, and “Windy City” isn’t about the breeze—it's a nod to the city’s long-winded politicians.

There were about 15 Oracle folks at the conference, but I spent most of my time with my teammate Jitesh. We’ve been collaborating on a few key accounts, but this was our first time meeting face-to-face. Safe to say, we hit it off quickly. Jitesh is based in the area, so he took me out to a couple of his go-to spots for dinner—definitely a perk to having a local connection. Most of the day was packed with sessions and meetings, but the evenings out made the work trip feel a lot more like a real adventure.

We bumped into a genuine movie star one of the nights—John David Washington, the son of Denzel Washington, who was in town for the premiere of The Piano Lesson, coming to Netflix soon. I recognized him and his voice instantly because I’m a fan of his work, including Ballers, BlacKkKlansman, and The Creator. We ended up facing each other the whole time at dinner, and I even worked up the nerve to shout out that I’m a huge fan. He graciously thanked me, and now, I’m convinced we share a special bond—one that he may or may not be aware of.

After three nights away, it was good to be back in Minnesota, even if it meant trading conference rooms for Grandma Linda in the backseat. We headed over to Avery and Abby’s place for dinner and some college football—because nothing says “family bonding” like yelling at the TV together. And sure, I wasn’t on my own couch, but I’d take their place over another hotel room any day. Plus, watching football with them? Way more entertaining than those conference sessions.

On Sunday, Luke and I headed to U.S. Bank Stadium, ready for a showdown between our undefeated Vikings and the 4-1 Lions. This game had all the makings of a classic NFC North clash—two strong teams with a lot to prove. The Lions have been a serious contender these last couple of seasons, making us a little nervous, but the Vikings have been absolutely rolling this year. It’s always a bit of a thrill to watch a game with stakes this high, and we were hopeful that the home-field advantage would make all the difference.

The game started off with a lot of promise for the Vikings, jumping out to a 10-0 lead after a 34-yard touchdown run from Aaron Jones and a 57-yard field goal from Will Reichard. But then Sam Darnold threw an interception, and it was like flipping a switch. Suddenly, the momentum shifted, and Detroit’s offense caught fire. They put up 21 unanswered points before halftime, including a 45-yard touchdown run from Jahmyr Gibbs, who seemed to glide right through the Vikings' defense. By the end of the second quarter, it felt like we went from cruising to chaos, and the Vikings found themselves in unfamiliar territory—playing catch-up.

The Vikings stormed back in the second half, with a clutch touchdown by Justin Jefferson and a defensive score that actually put them back in the lead late in the fourth quarter. But Detroit's offense wasn’t having it. Jared Goff led a clinical march down the field, setting up a game-winning field goal that sealed the deal. It was a tough loss, but hey, you can't win 'em all. Maybe dropping one now will give them the edge to bounce back Thursday night in LA against the Rams. Here’s hoping for a quick turnaround—because nobody likes a losing streak!

@toddswank Sam Darnold throws TD pass to Justin Jefferson! #vikings #skol ♬ Let's Go - JAXSON GAMBLE

The Minnesota Vikings Flew Us To Jolly Old England

 

The Minnesota Vikings Flew Us To Jolly Old England

Todd Swank's Diary Entry for October 13, 2024

Last weekend, we flew to London for an unforgettable adventure. After a blur of a Heathrow Express ride, a quick Uber to the hotel, and dropping off our bags, we jumped back on the Tube. Our first mission: Buckingham Palace to catch the Changing of the Guard. But, of course, by the time we fought our way through a sea of tourists, we could barely see anything through the gates. It was chaos, it was exhausting—and it was the perfect way to dive headfirst into the madness that is London.

We managed to sneak a few peeks of the Changing of the Guard by weaving through the crowd like pros—until we paused for a photo and promptly got scolded by the police to “keep moving.” Buckingham Palace, with its 775 rooms and royal fanfare, was impressive, but the guard ceremony itself was a chaotic ballet of red coats and tourists' elbows. It’s been a tradition since 1660, but honestly, we mostly saw camera phones and heads in our way. 

We were incredibly lucky to win this trip, courtesy of the Minnesota Vikings, to see them take on the New York Jets. The Vikings ran a contest to incentivize season ticket holders to pay their invoices early. I paid mine immediately, not expecting much—but by the time Max called to tell me I’d won, I’d completely forgotten about it. What an awesome surprise! Flight, hotel, and game tickets all covered—how could you not love that? We are very blessed!

After Buckingham Palace, we had tickets to tour Westminster Abbey. With a few hours to kill, we wandered through the city, hitting all the iconic spots—Big Ben, Parliament, and the statue-filled Parliament Square. We tried our best to blend in and not look like lost tourists, but let’s face it—I stick out like a sore thumb. And the irony? I’ve only got one thumb… which, technically, used to be a finger.

Westminster Abbey was nothing short of awe-inspiring. It’s been the site of every British coronation since 1066 and holds the remains of kings, queens, poets, and scientists alike, including Sir Isaac Newton and Charles Dickens. The gothic architecture is overwhelming, with towering arches and intricate stained-glass windows that make you feel small in the best way. Walking through, we marveled at the beauty—and got a bit creeped out knowing just how many famous people were buried beneath our feet. It’s both a celebration of history and a reminder that even legends eventually take up residence underground.

The craftsmanship throughout this ancient cathedral is beyond stunning—everywhere you look, there’s a new marvel to take in. It's also packed with enough famous skeletons to fill a Hollywood red carpet—kings, queens, and poets, all crammed in like it’s a VIP section for the afterlife. We strolled through Poet’s Corner, where Chaucer, Dickens, and Shakespeare either rest or have plaques pretending they do. Fun fact: they even stuck Charles Darwin in here—because nothing says poetic justice like a scientist buried in a church. And while the architecture made our jaws drop, it’s a little unsettling knowing half the floor you're walking on is just decorative burial space.

Navigating the Tube felt like jumping into an urban labyrinth. London's Underground is the oldest subway system in the world, kicking off operations in 1863, and it moves millions of people every day. In the daylight hours, it’s a well-oiled machine—but those early mornings? A different story. Wandering through the empty tunnels, with no one around except the occasional flickering light, felt like we’d been cast in a horror movie. It was creepy enough that we kept waiting for someone to pop out from a dark corner just to say, "Welcome to the dungeon!"

We kicked off Saturday with an all-day bus tour through the gorgeous English countryside. Rolling hills, charming villages, and ancient landmarks dotted the landscape like scenes from a postcard. Every bend in the road felt like stepping back in time, as if the land itself had stories to tell that go back millennia. Compared to this, America feels like it’s still figuring things out. There’s something surreal about driving past castles, Roman baths, and mystical stone circles, all in one day—like history is just casually scattered along the highways here. It was both humbling and exhilarating, and we couldn’t wait to dive deeper into each spot.

Traveling always gets better when you meet great people. We hit it off with Phil and Mel, die-hard Vikings fans like us, also here for the game. Jerry and Susie, on the other hand, were from Australia, hopping around Europe. Sharing laughs and stories with these new friends made the whole adventure way more rewarding—because let’s face it, exploring is way more fun when you're doing it with good company.

Windsor Castle was downright majestic. Walking through its grand halls and private quarters, it’s easy to imagine the royals casually sipping tea here—when they’re not busy being fabulously royal. Fun fact: It’s the largest, oldest inhabited castle in the world, but somehow they still manage to open it up to the public like it’s just another tourist trap. Honestly, letting us wander around their actual living space? Bold move. I kept expecting a butler to pop out and say, “Please don’t touch the Queen’s favorite chair.”

We stumbled upon the guards suiting up for the day—classic case of “wrong place, wrong time.” Got told more than once to step aside as they were clearly not thrilled to have tourists in their workspace. These guards may look like ceremonial figures, but they’re actually active-duty soldiers from the Household Division, responsible for protecting the royal residences. Oh, and those iconic bearskin hats? They weigh about 1.5 pounds—imagine trying to stay stoic with that perched on your head all day.

Stonehenge was a bit surreal to visit, but I’ll be honest—it’s out in the middle of nowhere and really just looks like someone abandoned a stack of rocks. But hey, it’s ancient rocks. Built around 3000 BC, it’s older than the Pyramids and was likely used as a burial site and for astronomical rituals. Scientists are still debating how these massive stones were transported—some came from 150 miles away. I was hoping for something supernatural, like a stone shifting or a mystical portal opening. But no such luck—just a windy field and a lot of speculation.

By the time we reached Bath, we were running on fumes and didn’t have much energy left for exploring. But we did stumble upon the Bath Abbey, a stunning Gothic structure that anchors the heart of town. Bath, known for its Roman-built baths and hot springs, is the only place in the UK where you can bathe in naturally warm, mineral-rich waters. It’s also a UNESCO World Heritage Site, famous for its elegant Georgian architecture. After a quick coffee break at a local café, we climbed back on the bus for the long ride back to the hotel—heads full of history and feet begging for mercy.

Sunday was game day, and we navigated the Tube and train to Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, a futuristic venue with a retractable NFL field beneath its soccer pitch. The NFL has been bringing games to London since 2007, building a loyal overseas fanbase and making these matchups an annual tradition. We couldn’t resist getting a photo with the Vikings cheerleaders, and we didn’t mind the TV camera catching us either. About 30 minutes later, a good friend texted me from Minnesota—at 5 a.m. their time—saying he just saw us on the NFL Network. Sadly, I haven’t been able to track down the footage yet, which is disappointing, because I’d really love to see how sexy we looked.

Tottenham Hotspur Stadium is absolutely stunning. Not only is it brand-new and designed with world-class amenities, but they also included food with our tickets—though I’ll admit, London cuisine didn’t exactly win us over. One thing they nailed, though: free beer at halftime. Now that’s a tradition I wouldn’t mind bringing stateside. What really blew me away was the sea of Vikings fans—it felt like a purple takeover. I swear, the crowd was 10-to-1 Vikings fans vs. Jets fans, making the whole thing feel more like a home game in Minneapolis than a London showdown.

Coming into the game with an undefeated 4-0 record, the Vikings had us all riding high. It’s impossible not to love a team led by stars like Justin Jefferson, who makes everything on the field look easy. And the atmosphere? Unreal. The Gjallarhorn’s booming call shook the air, and the SKOL chant rattled the stadium like it was built on a fault line. Honestly, if the players weren’t feeding off that energy, they deserve an Oscar for faking it.

Sam Darnold had every reason to be pumped going into this game. Fresh off being named NFC Offensive Player of the Week and Player of the Month, the guy has been on a tear. But you’ve got to imagine this one hit a little differently—facing the team that once pinned their hopes on him only to move on faster than a bad stock tip. After an up-and-down journey through New York, a rocky stint in Carolina, and now a resurgence, it seems like Darnold has finally found his groove. If revenge games fuel players, this one probably had him waking up early with a little extra bounce in his step.

The stadium was packed with Vikings legends, including Jared Allen, who was honored at halftime with induction into the London Ring of Honour. Seeing Allen recognized for his incredible career, including his knack for racking up sacks, was the perfect cherry on top of an already thrilling day. It’s always a blast to witness these moments firsthand, especially when they celebrate players who helped define the heart and soul of the team.

The Vikings stormed out to a 17-0 lead, only to do what they do best—make us sweat. The Jets clawed back, and for a minute there, it felt like Rodgers was about to pull off one of his vintage comebacks. But nope—Stephon Gilmore picked him off in the final minutes, capping Rodgers' day with three interceptions. Meanwhile, Andrew Van Ginkel’s 63-yard pick-six was the ultimate "thanks for the early Christmas gift" moment. In the end, the Vikings held on 23-17, staying undefeated at 5-0 and proving, once again, nothing feels sweeter than beating Rodgers.

On our final day, we visited Tower Bridge, the real star of London’s skyline. Built in 1894, it’s a bascule bridge—which means it lifts in the middle to let ships pass beneath. The twin Gothic-style towers give it that fairytale look, but it’s all business when those roadways swing open, still operating the same way they did over a century ago. Walking across it, surrounded by all that history, was the perfect way to end the trip—though I was half-hoping we’d see it lift while we were on it, just to add some adventure to our last day.

The British Museum is an overwhelming treasure trove of human history, art, and culture—and believe me, by day four of our whirlwind trip, I was feeling every step. Founded in 1753, the museum holds more than 8 million artifacts, from the Rosetta Stone to ancient Egyptian mummies. It’s basically the world’s attic, filled with things Britain “borrowed indefinitely.” Miss Sheri, however, was fully in her element, snapping photos of every exhibit like a paparazzo on assignment. Meanwhile, I just tried to stay upright, wondering how many more rooms we had to trudge through before I could find a chair... or a snack.

The British Museum is packed with some of the most jaw-dropping artifacts, spanning continents and millennia. It houses the Rosetta Stone—basically the first-ever translation app—and massive chunks of the Parthenon, aka the “Elgin Marbles,” which Greece still isn’t thrilled about losing. With over 8 million objects in its collection, the place feels like the world’s oldest treasure hunt. Then there was this guy—an ancient bust just sitting there, begging for a challenge. So naturally, I leaned in for a stare-off. Verdict? He stayed stone-cold, and I blinked first.

Here's some TikToks I made during the trip:

@toddswank Westminster Abbey is Awe Inspiring!#westminsterabbey #london ♬ Magic Glockenspiel - DOMANSED

@toddswank Windsor Castle is so beautiful!! #windsor #castle #england ♬ original sound - Todd Swank

@toddswank Stonehenge #stonehenge #england ♬ original sound - Todd Swank

@toddswank Lots of Vikings Fans in London!! #vikings #skol #london ♬ HOT TO GO! - Chappell Roan

@toddswank Pre game warmups in London. #vikings #SKOL #london ♬ Game Day - ROKKA

@toddswank The Vikings game in London was a bunch of fun! 5-0!! #vikings #london #SKOL ♬ Powerful songs like action movie music - Tansa

@toddswank One of our favorite discoveries in London. The Outernet! #outernet #london #experience ♬ Halloween ・ cute horror song - PeriTune